My World

The world according to me!

Went to Church Yesterday…

Remember how in my About page I said I was a lapsing Catholic, I wasn’t kidding. Yesterday was the first time I made it to Sunday Mass since I started this blog. Though I made it to First Friday Mass to start my August off right. The Service was lovely but I digress.

It’s always a little spooky when the Spirit in the Mass is revealed. You know what I mean, you’re sitting there and Father says something directly too you. That happened to me on Sunday. It wasn’t the biggest deal, I guess because I try not to get too emotional, but I felt it.

Yesterday was the 19th Sunday in Ordinary Time, and the Gospel Reading was taken from Matthew 14: 22-33. That’s when Jesus walked on the water during the storm to meet the disciples.

That part that spoke to me was when Peter asked the Lord to let him walk out on the water to meet him. But when Peter reached on the water, he heard the wind and started to doubt and then started to sink. He called out to the Lord to save him; which he did, but he also scolded Peter for doubting him.

I do that! I doubt, I worry and don’t like when things don’t go according to my plan. Then in my desperate fear, I pray to the Lord to help me understand, yet beg him for my own way.

Sunday’s Gospel reading also held a special significance in my heart because a co-worker told me that same thing this week. I was telling her, I’m the kind of person who sees the forest, not the trees. I can eventually, but it takes a lot out of me. I have to work at it. She said the best piece of advice she ever got was from her boss, during her exit interview when she was fired. He told her that she was a coward, because if she really wanted her dream job, she would have it. And he was right.

Granted I got into my dream masters at my dream university. It’s really expensive with the conversion and everything. But my mother says she’ll stand the loan, and while it doesn’t solve all of my finance issues I’ll move in faith and work towards going. People keep saying, “Don’t worry, money will come.” I never really believe them, but I’ll try for once.

For once I’ll walk on the water to God, without worrying about the wind.


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